◆自觉◆

Mr.Messy came into my life

mess up with me this whole week
my mind
my life
is all destroyed

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SELF-COGNITION
♥郑巧梅 Tee Chiau May
♥草莓 Strawberry
♥女 Female
♥17
♥04.04.1992
♥牧羊座 Aries
♥猴子 Monkey
♥si11ygal_chocolate@hotmail.com
♥Jocelyn,YuQi,Pei Qie,Yi Ning,Emilia
♥B.Long,C.How,D.Qin,T.Hui,L.Hong,W.Duan
♥time spent with friends and family members
♥beach
♥white,black,blue,apple green

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I
love to lead my life in a simple way
I
love to carry on my life with all my friends and family members around me
I
love to be as simple as i can
I
hope to be a happy girl
I
hope to have peace in my mind and heart
I
hope to be a stranger but know all of those i love

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I
used to be so
optimistic
broad-minded
outspoken
but now
I
become so
fake
feign
ugly

I
wish that i could get back to who i used to be
I
wish that i could be happy forever
I
wish that i could be more honest to myself

in fact
who am i?
i feel so unfamiliar to myself

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I
like this
but
I'm
thinking of that

I
said that it can't be possible to happen again
but
I
thinking of back to the original place where i came from
I
like the dote
but
I'm
resist to it
as i know
it can't be possible for this to happen
I
think of that
thought that i would get back to that
but
in fact
I like this

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I
a coward
running away from the problems
escaping away from the reality
flee from my truth feeling
evade from what exactly my mind was thinking
slip away from the small hole that i found
abscond like a fugitive
and be a escapee

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I
trying hard to cover my sad face
trying hard to envelop my feelings
trying hard to disguise I'm happy and nothings really happened
wearing a veil to cover up myself
and conceal myself from getting anymore hurt
wanna find my refuge island for myself and stay inside it
won't come out ever again from my safety island
wanna stay apart from all those
escape
to a place that make me feel secure

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I wanna remain my smile
that used to be shown on my face
I wanna smile with happiness
just realise that
a person with a smile on their face
may be truely happy about something
but
they may be also use the smile to hide their wound
and
that person is me
don't ever think that
you can know a person so well by just observing their outer appearance
their heart is aching painfully
I'm
too....