Long time no see.

Hi, blog. :)
Really long time no see..
How's life?
Good? Bad?
Doesn't really that important anymore.
As long as I am alive and living on, that's it.

I'm single but I doesn't wanna be available anymore.
Not because of him or whatever, just that I doesn't want to.
I don't even know what I want now.
Everything felt so miserable for me..
Work? Love? Family?
Who am I?
What I wanna do?
I DON'T FUCKING KNOW ABOUT ANYTHING!!!

_________________________________________________________________________________

是..
我又在钻牛角尖了..

这世界有太多道理
当我们把所有的道理都摆在一块儿
就互相矛盾了
道理也是人想出来的
人自己本身都很矛盾了
也许也只是那么刚好某句道理说服了自己停止想象那一切
但..
我知道..
当下没有一句大道理能让我清醒 指引我方向...

_________________________________________________________________________________

L I F E   D O E S N ' T   S U C K

I   A M   T H E   O N E

End of 2012.

The very last month of 2012.
Indeed, this month made me felt what "stress" really is.

I wasn't even know what stress is before this month.
Exam, coursework, test, prom night, problems, problems and problems!!
Lots of it really kill me even though I'm still alive here typing this post.
But my mental and mind wasn't here anymore.
I'm way too tired for all of these.
One more week later I'll be free with two weeks holidays!
YeePeeee~  ❤



What should be done and what shouldn't?
I'm so confused for all that and I feel I didn't getting back anything I desired for.
Big SIGH!!


The long long story might come to an end...
but I really hope that it could carry on and on until I face the death.
What more can I do to maintain and retain it?
Doesn't I done enough for it?
I'm so tired for this...
Really hope to end it but I couldn't bear to let go.
God, My Lord, please show me a path.
How and what should I do?
The start of it was lead by You and I really trusted You so much yet, I'm afraid I can't carry on anymore...




Please let me....  show me how to love you....

Do you.? :')

I'm still having uncertainty in my mind..
Do you ever care?
I think, you do.
but, how much?

I really felt like being neglected..
All I want is just that simple.
and yet, you doesn't know.
How I wish to be single and alone now.
I don't wanna to care that much please.
Just let me be myself but not the one who think so much for you
and yet, doesn't even feel the same way from you.

The one who care and feel sorry for me wasn't you anymore.
Is it real that these two horoscope wasn't meant to be together for these long?
I just simply want you accompany me to buy something.
yet, you said I can get it by myself.
Meanwhile, you just called me and said tomorrow we're going out early to get some crabs for your colleagues as your birthday is approaching.
What am I now?
All the time you left for me is just sleeping while I daydreaming by myself looking at you sleeping.


If there's somehow I doesn't even care what time you reach your working place anymore
I wasn't with you already..
You're the one who let me felt so much left out.
It wasn't about love anymore...
and you always check back on her..
making me so heart broken..
I really feel like I'm just the one linger around your heart.
The one who really deep inside living under a secure house wasn't me at all..

Please..
Look at me..
This will be the ever last time I beg..

Why school.!?

So damn life. ==

I'm frustrated already.!!!

Why I must always accept what you all wanted me to do so obediently.??????


WHY.!!!!!!?????



Damn.!!

I shouldn't had promise to study again as what I want for my life wasn't it at all.!

I'll die here for 2 years

How damn was it and how damn will it be.!? T_______T

I wanna work and the most important thing is

I WANTED TO LEAVE HERE.!!!!!!!

I don't feel like staying here anymore.!

JiLaKak la~~~

Hope that the half year practical training come faster.. ==

The only thing is that I got you.

Thanks for appearing in my life and make it so colourful. :)

I love you~

快要4个月拉 ^—^

这是你送来的天使
它守护着我们的所有

它会一切看着我们

为我们完成向它述说的一切···

:)

还记得昨夜我说得对不起吗?

它 述说着昨天一整天下来
你所忍受下来的一切

我知道 知道从下午开始你的心情就不好

你从不说出口 但我感受得到

因为彼此的心是联系着的

有太多太多的对不起

最最错误的是

我让你自责了

为什么要让一切都是因为你才错了?

请记得 那个爱着我的是你 让我受伤的是他

是你安抚了我的情绪

你的一句"那我们回家吧"

就让我知道 我的一切在你心里胜过所有

但是我并不能孩子气

不能让你在你朋友面前难做人

我更知道 我的一句"我没事"

不能让你那已混乱的思绪静下来

那样的心情 那样的时候

我们什么也做不了

可是宝贝 你可知道?
眼神里的哀伤骗不了人

我看你笑着 假笑着望着我 可是你那哀伤的眼神让我好心疼

对不起我竟让你承受着那一切痛楚

多久没泪流满面?
你可否知道

你是我第一个当面哭得像小孩的男人

你是那第一个在我哭泣时候紧紧抱着我的人

你是那第一个为我擦干泪水的男人

你是那第一个用你的方式让我脸上又有笑容的男人

所以 我是真的真的很爱很爱很爱你

好不好

我们别再为那些与我们生命不相干的人事物来伤害彼此?

好不好

就算真的不能不去理会那些 我们也要一起牵着彼此的手笑着对过去说"谢谢你让我遇见这未来跟我一起看日出的家伙"

好不好

就让我们更珍惜彼此···?

谢谢你的拥抱

只是因为感觉太深 太爱你

眼泪才那么轻易的掉落。

105 loves.

12.02.2012

一起跑了去游神. :)

今年的很棒很棒吖
因为有你 ♥

你让一切变得美好
你总是能让我开心地笑着

因为你 我很幸福快乐. ^^

还有这张很傻很傻的照片
哈哈哈哈~
还记得 拍完了过后我们一起笑了. :)

还有在Danga Bay一起散步的. :)
虽然说下雨了 可是我们还是能玩得像疯子一样 =w=

谢谢亲爱的礼物. :D

很喜欢 很开心. ^^

或许 我不能为你做些什么

但是 只要有你 我就会让你看见

有你时 我脸上的笑容 会一天比一天地灿烂美丽

虽然说 我的笑容 没能像你曾经喜欢的那个笑容一样..

92 loves.

宝贝宝贝吖

3个月咯我们 :)

好不容易呀 是不是.?

只是 我不明白.............

为什么不能简简单单就好??

难道 真的每个都要那样吗.?

你知道的.........

我不喜欢

可是你却很开心

没办法 我还能怎样?

两个人 就都会有个人先要在某些事忍让吧?

所以.........
就那样吧 :)

只想要看到你开心的

可是........................

有时候真的很不喜欢 很讨厌的

我

只想要简单平凡的幸福

我不要那些 能不能?
好不好..................................?

80的爱 ;)

我们其实没在算日子

只是每天过得太疯狂__♥

看看我爱的照片 :D
凭感觉弄出来的就是会很爱 满足吖

哈哈哈

我们疯疯癫癫地经历了好多...

只是 亲爱的

我很想认真坦率地做自己

行嚒..?

不要 也不想被那回忆束缚着

那是过去 不是嚒(?)

我能不能 那么自私地请求你

好不好 我们能有那么一天牵起彼此的手述说我们的以前

能不计前贤

因为我们已经在一起了

就是要坦然去面对 :)

因为我爱你 ♥

昨天吖昨天!!!

新加坡疯狂 O__O||
其实拉 也没很疯狂 因为我们都很累 =___=|||

我们还有好多地方要一起去

老公 对不对吖 (",)

所以 不要去计较你是不是第一个

你心里清楚 你会是那最后的一个

并不是每个第一个的都会在最终成为赢家

能撑到最后的那个才是赢家

那个赢得我的心的人 是你___邱伟棋 ^____^

这样的默契

要一直继续下去

我们还要

一起走

好久好久好久

(···)

因为爱 我们还有未知的未来

我爱上了这么样的你 叫我如何是好 (?)

邱伟棋____你可不可以别让我越陷越深|?|

干嘛要对我那样好?

你前世没欠我什么吧?

你爱我 足足远超过我爱你很多很多了

这样不公平的爱你也要?

_______只怕我被你爱得太多 宠得太多 我会得意忘形

对你越来越霸道 越来越任性 越来越蛮横无理

真的 ___只因为爱

那样的未知数 我会走下去

只怕你/我走偏了 请记得

无论如何 要紧紧牵着彼此的手 呵护彼此的心

我只怕自己走丢 我也怕你迷茫

不需要承诺 ________你给的爱已足够 ♥

那天 我们在一起一个月 :)

就那一天

静静得手牵着手逛街

就那一天

短短的几个小时

就那一天

那场电影让我们发笑

就那一天

我看着身旁的你睡得正熟

就那一天

我一直担心着车里的你

就那一天

看见你真正开心的笑容

就那一天

我们在一起一个月了

不长不短

我爱你 爱了足足一个月

谢谢你这一个月的包容

谢谢你这一个月的忍让

谢谢你这一个月的疼爱

对不起这一个月让你担心了很多

对不起这一个月让你辛苦了很多

我是 真的真的真的 很爱你

开心.? 伤心.?

话说 昨天整天在抓kit.!! =_=#

只是你不懂

我们一整天去过的地方 回忆涌现吖

不想让你知道我在烦恼着

那堆烂回忆突然侵蚀着

你却在身边让我那么受疼爱

这样的感觉怎么样去承受 (?)

不说出口

我不想让你又伤心

没有谁的爱情经得起重重打击重重伤害

我只想要你被幸福包裹着

能有你在身边 一切总是如此美好

虽然事实上很沉闷
可是 只要有你在 就已足够我去抵抗那沉闷的心

过后去了跟同事们的派对

没有真正的知心在

没有工作的压力

还有多张陌生的脸孔

其实 这样的情况下

反而活得自在

那短短的几个小时

我是真正的自己

不受拘束的

谢谢Angela给的这宝贵时刻

感恩吖

只是你不知

那一段话语过后

还有一句真正刺痛心弦的

以前的谎言 打破了以往的信任

小小的心灵 变得如此遥不可及

所以 如果我们要继续一起挽着走

我不会再对家人隐瞒些什么

我要让他们知道 我就是这么爱你

晚上突如其来的kit

我带上你一起去

因为你总能让我那么安心

虽说 朋友不知情的让你痛心了

但你怎么忘了已经说好的.?

别闷不吭声吖

闷不吭声的爱情最脆弱

一开始不是说要好好保护嚒.?

一开始不是说要是最后的.?

怎么这种情况的发生 却让你这么束手无策.?

我不甘心

我还不想放弃

我已经不能失去

拼了命地去探索你的心 去了解那一切 去安抚你的心

你那样我好束手无策

我怕你先走了 我该怎么办

你不知道 我有多爱你

多得 自己痛着心也好 我不要你受委屈

每一次的拥抱 我很感激

但我却没能给你你要的

对不起

真的于事无补

但我感激

感激那个 在我喝酒头晕时 牵着我的手离开那喧哗吵闹的你

感激那个 在我恐慌害怕时 给我温暖的拥抱让我平静的你

感激那个 在我疲惫睡着时 让我能如此安心的在你面前熟睡的你

你让我如此暖心

我怎么舍得让你痛心.?

1个月都不到

我已经感觉我们经历了很多东西

已经在一起好久好久

我真的要跟你一起走下去.

那一晚 谢谢这么多年的朋友的关心和爱护

可是 宝贝座位上

你是唯一

就让你骄傲的坐着

我温柔的维护着

我强悍的保卫着

·· 我们的爱情 ··

That Moment..

那一刻..

That moment..

我只能用心痛来形容

I could only express it as heart broken

16/11/2011

I HATE.!! :(

总感觉今天好怪

总感觉我让你辛苦了

我自私的可以

'F' my day.

当你不再看着我笑

当你不再跟我说话

我会害怕

:(((

emoooooooooooooooooooo吖

><""""""""""""""""

我该怎么办才好........(?)

有些东西开不了口的咯

鸡蛋糕

死个性还是一样 =___________=

最王八的竟然是我吖.!!!!! =_="""

Happiness filled my Nov.

我的11月很幸福.~

他他他~~

邱伟棋先生

谢谢你. :)

我说嘿~

这男人

我很爱他 X)

哪个看上眼的

不要乱乱来咯

他是我的唯一

Mr. Rayson

对你说过的一切

我会记得 也一定会做到

你也要哦 :)

我相信你会的~

谢谢你说会陪我走过那段煎熬的日子

我们做到了

谢谢你要我抛开一切恐惧跟你走

我们做到了

谢谢你的不放弃换来现在的我们

谢谢你给的足够的爱·关怀·包容·忍让

谢谢你的一切

可是

今天我要说....

对不起下午让你不开心了~

但是我下午对你说的全部都是真的 :)

'''''''''''''''''

宝贝

请不要在意别的

我的心只有你一个

''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

"I cannot be without you start from 01.11.2011

And I gonna walk together with you since the day we fall in love"

Great start of October.!

Let's say again.

Happy Birthday to you, my dear 'Chia How'~

Lol.

I love the cake to the max.!!

Actually, I ordered this cake on 28th Sept.

According to my Manager and Supervisor, this cake would be more tasty if it's leave on for one or two days before you have it.

So, I accepted their suggestion and fix the date on 30th Sept.

The cake was sent on the exact date stated above and I really left it for one day in the fridge.

And the next day when I had it is like, 'Yeah, awesome.!!'

LOL.~~

On 1st Oct...

The time for our birthday dinner is approaching~!!

I was damn hungry around 5:00pm something.. =____=

When the time reached 8:00pm sharp, I still got to take order for our table before I could get change and sat for my dinner.... /口\

Finally.~~~~

I HAVE MY FISH SANDWICH, COKE, TOMATO SOUP, CHICKEN CORDON BLEU.!!!!!!

Muahahahaha~~

I think, mostly were satisfied with their meal. :)

So, I'm happy too.~

TeeHeee~

Actually, one week before, I passed two slices of cake to Chia How and asked him to eat it and give me some suggestions on them.

And the one he chosen is the one we had yesterday night. :)

Just that the topping was change from marshmallow to chocolate slices as he doesn't like it.

Last, I doesn't feel like talking about the bill thing. -.-

It actually make me feel unease. :((

A big and nice photo of all of us. :D

Specially thanks to Serene Wong for taking pictures for us.~

And also to all the workers that night including me. :p

A best memory recorded again. ♥♥♥

Sept mood.

Happy Moon Cake Festival.?

Lol.

I just know that this is the first year I bought these moon cakes using my hard earn money.!!

And all these flour thingy actually cost me RM100+

Hell, I don't think I would ever buy that much again.

Maybe one or two the next time.?

And, one most important thing is that...

I FOUND OUT I'M GROWING FATTER AND FATTER AFTER ONE MONTH WORKING AT NINIQ.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hell big news. =___=

Have a look at this babe. :)

Keep on moving left and right when I trying to have a shoot.

But end up giving me a sweet smile.

Less fat... Less salt... Less calories...

And also less tasty. :(

I prefer Nando more than this after all.

On the same day after the meal, we (me, Ryan, PeiQie and her sis)

catch a movie called 'Contagion' as we fail to get the ticket for Johnny English.!

Badminton time.!!

Rawwwwr~~

Sweat like hell after the 1st round of game only. -.-

Have a hair cut. :D

Aunty suggested to cut it flat so I looked like the picture at the right.

But then, if I let all my fringe to one side, it'll look nicer.

That's what Aunty say and I do feel so, haha...

The baby domo I got from Xian.

As for the reason why I got it...

Is because after we had our date at LoudSpeakers, he drove home and got out from the car.

As he got out, he realised this little thingy on the road and pick it up then throw into the car.

So, that's the fate of this little poor thing... =__=

Good morning from a plain crazy girl. LOL..

Her name in Niniq is Strawberry. :)

Yes, a sketch photo of mine edited using photowonder.~

Playful as I used to even though after a tiring day of work. :)

Energetic is the attitude to move on and live on.!

Special cake of the day.!

Elmo.!! :D

I got so high after seeing it. :p

Specially brought to you by Niniq Bakery & Bistro. :)

25th of Sept.

A memorable day as some of them had make up and they actually prettier than me.!

LOL.!!

Let's see. :)

Unfortunately, I have to admit that he looks super awesome in this photo. :)

Another shot with Chia How.

TaDaa~

My buddy who got the same birthday date with me. :)

Isshhhh~

I looked ugly.. -.-

Mum with sisters in cat looks.

Add on another 'tikus' behind. LOL.

TeeHeee~

I love this photo lots lots.~~

And it'll be the end of my September 2011.!

I got'cha and please stay tuned.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

Lots of love. :)

2 months ago..

I'm not back for 2 months.!

Is a freak.!

Aug I'm working.

Sept I'm also working.

However, Aug was way too fun compare to now.

I was working in 100Yen last month.

I was having a great fun fair time.

I was given a small red bear won by LeanHong.

I changed my job.

Took a photo with a silliest pose ever.

I was having a great night in LoudSpeaker.

On the same night, we had our Heineken.

I bought myself a new wallet with the cheapest price ever.

Went to Singapore Zoo before the national day.

My latest facebook profile picture.

Last Japanese Cartoon I watched.

And so, that's the end of my Aug. :)

So much for my happy ending.! :D

The start of Sept was not that fun as Aug. :(

I went for exercise, badminton.! > o <

My name tag was changed from 'Trainee' to 'Strawberry'. :D

This kiddo is my favourite person to be seen every morning before I off to work.

Today hang out with Ryan.

We went to Nando's.

This is it. :)

Tomorrow gonna be a great new day.

Happy Moon Cake Festival to all.

Me and my colleagues will be having Moon Cake's high tea in Niniq.! :p

The last important thing is,

who is currently seeking for job.!?

Niniq is short of a team partner.!

We need YOU.!! :D

Join us and have fun together in our work. ♥♥

FLEE.

How I wish to just flee.

Life now is not mine at all isn't it?

I knew..

Try to be happy as though I used to.

Truly, the childhood that passed.

Couldn't be back even if you wanted it that much.

I went to playground and find myself a see-saw to sit on.

Ups and downs.

Ain't it life?

You couldn't have control on it.

You'll just go on and on endlessly.

A stop will only obtain when your life end.

But I don't wish to have an end that early.

I just hope that I could have a chance to have control on it.

I live on happily and that's it.

Not a big and greedy request.

Hope there's one day, I could smile so true.

I wish...

I beg for..

谢和弦 于是长大了以后

很真实 有没有?

他的原则 他的道理

我很崇拜. :)

会把梦想 变成动词

加油.!! :D

於是長大了以後
你發現聖誕節 沒有聖誕老公公
於是長大了以後
你發現吳剛嫦娥 都不住在月球
於是長大了以後
你發現王子公主 居然也有在陪酒
於是長大了以後
你發現課本裡面教的學的 都只能當參考用

於是長大了以後 有些事你非得要經歷搞懂
長大了以後 不想懂也要懂
認命的接受 不認命也接受 只是受殤還受用

於是長大了以後 我們都跟那現實做了朋友
忘記了單純天真 其實才是你的摯友
卻沒人能夠 卻沒人能夠 躲得過

原來這就是登大人 原來這就是社會黑暗
原來這就是小漢時候 整天夢呀夢呀夢
原來這就是登大人 大漢了後才知挫哩等
原來三分天註定 七分靠打拼 愛拼才會贏

Gathering. :3

Lots of gathering within this week.

What to say?

Tired?

Yea, undeniably.

But then, I LOVE IT.! <3

Woots!!~

I'm not an anti-social person okay?

Gathering is meant for me. ;)

So far so great.

But my results are sucks man!

Ruin my epic high mood. ;(

Mr. Chemistry was just not meant to be with me.

I'm sorry that I got to break up with you. :'(

Hell Yeah.

I'm super duper hyper 'pek cek' now...... =____=

Let's just calm my mind.

If I said I'm gonna quit.

YEAH, I QUIT.